Can Cameron really be this stupid?

Content warning – much like my last one this post has again been written under the influence of a descending red mist and contains more bad language and horrible oaths caused by the latest dribblings of the British Prime Miniscule. If my dog was called Cameron I would have to resist the temptation to punch him.

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Dave? Do you think that this might possibly have something to do with the fact that you haven’t stopped spunking away money by the billion as fast as you can tax it off of the current workforce and borrow it on behalf of their children? Fucking hellfire, in the last couple of days we’re told that you’ve blown half a billion on the Northern Rock sale, granted perhaps unavoidably, and that you’ve decided to throw almost the same again at the building industry while underwriting all the mortgages of first time buyers. Not only have you not cut public spending you’re actually spending even more than Labour did, and incidentally failed to get the public sector to stop thinking of that as a cut as well as failed to get them to stop hiring for bullshit jobs instead of people who actually provide useful services. You’ve carried on taking money that could have paid down some of the UK’s eye watering debt and handing it to the EU, IMF and international aid, and you’ve continued Labour’s wars at significant cost and embarked on a military adventure of your own. The bonfire of the quangos was at best a barbecue of a handful of them – one of those small barbecues made of thick tinfoil that you get from petrol stations, and for which you probably paid in cash and told the attendant to keep the change from a million quid. And you’ve failed to create growth because you’ve refused to provide the conditions for it to occur. That’s just off the top of my head and I’m sure I could think of more given time and find out more still if I started looking. And here you are scratching your arse – it apparently being interchangeable with your head – and wondering why the plan’s not working.

I’ll tell you why, David. It’s because it’s basically the same fucking plan that Gordon Brown was using, you hopelessly inept twat. How the hell did Britain come to this? It’s had some dim politicians and not a few dim PMs, but how in Christ’s name did it get landed with you: a PM whose extraordinary dimness must surely result from being so dense that light can’t escape if it falls into his head? It’s not madness that is doing the same thing and expecting different results, it’s stupidity. And that’s actually the generous alternative because if I thought you knew what the fuck you were doing I’d be describing you as evil.

I hate to go all Private Frasier again, but if these fuckwits aren’t dragged out and chained to something solid where they can’t do any harm – the Lusitania for example – I really do think the UK is doomed.

35 comments for “Can Cameron really be this stupid?

  1. TDK
    November 23, 2011 at 2:15 pm

    in the last couple of days we’re told that you’ve blown half a billion on the Northern Rock sale

    Hell, I don’t want to defend Dave but he can only be blamed for selling it for less than it was worth, not for selling it for less than Gordon paid for it. The two values are not the same.

    • November 23, 2011 at 2:29 pm

      I did say he probably didn’t have much option, but when we’re talking Cobbleition profligacy and increasing debt we can’t really not mention it when the dozy sod’s wondering why the country’s finances are in the shitter.

  2. November 23, 2011 at 2:20 pm

    I just saw your title and said to myself: ‘Yes, he can.’

    • November 23, 2011 at 2:30 pm

      Yes, it answers itself really, doesn’t it?

    • November 23, 2011 at 6:34 pm


  3. Athelstan
    November 23, 2011 at 2:25 pm

    “I’ll tell you why, David. It’s because it’s basically the same fucking plan that Gordon Brown was using, you hopelessly inept twat.”

    And McBruin was only doing what Brussels told him to[budgetary advice], Dave is the EU’s boy – a technocratic plant [honestly an EU RED-Toryboy stitch-up], it is patently obvious.
    That’s why I hate the bastard more than Brown but less [just] than Bliar.

    What did we do to deserve any of these ****ers? 👿

    • November 23, 2011 at 2:37 pm

      It’s like one of those morality questions along the lines of if you had all of them lined up against a wall and only sixty thousand rounds of ammunition which one would you shoot most. Hmm, looking at it I’m not sure I’ve got that quite right… :mrgreen:

      • Chuckles
        November 23, 2011 at 3:09 pm

        How about, ‘If they were all in a boat about to go over the Victoria Falls, and you could either save them, or photograph it for posterity with the best photo of your career, would you go for colour film, or the simplicity of classic black and white?’

        • November 23, 2011 at 3:13 pm

          Pshop it afterwards however you like, as long as there are crocodiles at the bottom.

          • November 23, 2011 at 6:37 pm

            And Piranhas in the pool below. Never forget the Piranhas, or big spikes. Always good for a laugh, duplicitous politicians on big spikes.

  4. Jer
    November 23, 2011 at 3:15 pm

    Apart from omitting my favourite chunk of profanity “Dave you … slack-jawed, dribbling fuckwit” I cannot fault this piece.

    Thank you.

    • November 23, 2011 at 4:30 pm

      I wish I could say it was a pleasure but thinking about what a state the old place is in was thoroughly depressing for me.

  5. November 23, 2011 at 4:13 pm

    1. Remove ALL LibDems from the Cabinet
    2. Replace them with any real Patriot MPs that you can find, if you can find any.
    3. Repeal the European Communities Act
    4. Shut down any and all EU centric bodies.
    5. Remove the ability for local authorities, quangos, RDAs etc to receive instructions from Brussels, and to ban them from participating in the EU committees.
    6. Enact legislation to remove ANY civil servant working on EU matters.
    7. Stop ALL overseas aid.
    8. Immediately cease giving VAT receipts to Brussels, and reduce the overall VAT level to 10%
    9. Replace all income tax bands with a flat rate of 10%
    10. Replace all corporation tax bands with a flat rate of 15%
    11. Remove ALL tax allowances.
    12. Disbar and remove all Peers or MPs who are in receipt of an EU pension.
    13. With the removal of the ECA, declare all legislation that is tied to it null & void.
    14. Remove charitable status to ALL politically motivated or taxpayer funded bodies.
    15. Repeal the EHRA and reinstate Common Law courts.
    16. Raise the Union Jack over every government building, every day of the year.
    17. Leave all supranational bodies.
    18. Re-instate the Military Covenant and begin to reinvest in them.
    19. Close the borders to all immigration other than clearly defined humanitarian cases.
    20. Repatriate any foreign national who breaks our laws immediately upon conviction.
    21. Make Government borrowing illegal.

    But then we know Dave doesn’t have the balls….

    • nisakiman
      November 23, 2011 at 4:35 pm

      I reckon if you campaigned on a manifesto like that you’d probably get elected! 😈 Don’t think you’d carry the guardianistas or the greens / liberals though. But I reckon both Old Labour and Conservative (true blue, not Pinko-Lib-Lab-Con like Camerwrong) alike would go for it!

      • November 23, 2011 at 9:23 pm

        I wish I had your faith. Unfortunately the majority will continue to act & vote like sheep so nothing will change.

        • November 24, 2011 at 12:08 am

          Probably true. Sadly things will have to get even worse, possibly quite a bit worse, before enough people are sufficiently pissed off to want a genuine change. I think they actually want this but they’re annoyed because they want it to be a bit nicer. They don’t yet understand that the two are mutually exclusive. As things get progressively (no pun intended) worse that will change. Probably no mass Damascene conversion but if UKIP, as the closest thing Britain has to a libertarian party, and/or some independents can start to win a few seats they can at least have a moderating influence and maybe begin some meaningful change. It’s either that or the whole place really does have to go to hell first before the systems that took it there can be chucked completely and rebuilding begun. Currently I’m pessimistic enough to think that’s more likely, but either way I see it getting worse before it can get better. 😥

          • Lord T
            November 24, 2011 at 9:04 pm


            There actually is a Libertarian Party in the UK. A tad closer than UKIP who seem to advocate some strange policies. Definitely not Libertarian at all.

            • November 25, 2011 at 2:29 am

              No, they’re not, and I felt that May last year they were moving in towards authoritarianism so I spoiled my ballot for the first time in my adult life. LPUK were standing where I could vote and nor was there a like minded independent.

              Not sure which Libertarian Party you mean. I was under the impression LPUK had all but suicided leaving UKIP as the nearest thing, though whether near enough for libertarians to vote for is up for debate. Is there another one or do you know of plans to resurrect LPUK?

    • November 23, 2011 at 4:37 pm

      As an economic migrant myself, albeit in the opposite direction, I’d argue with number 19. Just stop giving them money and you’ll get the contributing kind of migrants rather than the ones who arrive with their hands out palms upwards having learnt only two words of English: ‘Asylum please.’ When the word goes back to various countries of origin that Britain’s streets are paved with litter, that there’s no free housing and money anymore, and that the choice is either to put in, hope for charity or starve to death then most will stop coming.

      The rest I don’t think I can argue with, but of course it’s all moot anyway. As you said, Camermong doesn’t have the cojones to do any of it.

      • November 23, 2011 at 4:53 pm

        Agree with that. Repealing the ECA would mean that we were no longer obliged to, so stopping payments for all would be an easy matter.

    • Treble9man
      November 23, 2011 at 5:34 pm

      yes, Yes, YES!!!!!
      Somebody please get up and do all this.

    • Moppy
      November 23, 2011 at 11:31 pm

      Where do I join?

    • Athelstan
      November 24, 2011 at 12:32 am

      Yes, all of it agreed.

    • November 24, 2011 at 2:50 pm

      “Remove ALL LibDems from the Cabinet”

      Definitely! What a waste of space they are!

    • November 24, 2011 at 4:39 pm

      It has been suggest that the list should also have another entry.

      22. All pensions to be free of taxation.

      Considering that you will have contributed all your life from taxed income, I can see no good reason to tax your pension again once you receive it.

      • November 24, 2011 at 5:55 pm

        Seems pretty reasonable, though I’ve alway been in favour of designing a tax system that’s largely if not wholly voluntary and this would probably mean getting rid of income tax anyway. Of course it’d also be necessary to tell the pollies that in government they’d be expected to live within the revenue raised or be twatted lightly about the head and neck with cricket bats inscribed with the words ‘IT’S NOT YOUR BLOODY MONEY’ until they do.

    • December 2, 2011 at 12:06 pm

      Re: the anti-EU stuff, Many in the EU would be all to happy to see the UK bail out. They might even encourage it. Much of the more daft proposals and motions were aided and abetted by the UK MEPs. UK MEPs have also been notoriously disruptive.

  6. sovereigntea
    November 23, 2011 at 6:32 pm

    Cameron has banking roots and connections the more debt the merrier spend spend spend.

    I predict a Blair like career in finance once he quits.

  7. Dave G
    November 23, 2011 at 10:47 pm

    You forgot the Governments obsession with all-things Global Warming and the taxation to ‘cure it’ therein.
    Have you read the latest from Huhne – what a fcukwit……

    • November 24, 2011 at 5:56 pm

      Yes, Huhne is the new Hoon.

  8. Andrew Duffin
    November 24, 2011 at 11:25 am

    Questions we can easily answer:

    “Can Dave really be this stupid”

  9. Robert Edwards
    November 24, 2011 at 2:27 pm

    A very restrained post, AE. As I survey what I suspect is little more than the smoking ruin of an economy as created by the last lot (I am reminded of thos 1941 newsreels of Russia as the Whermacht went through), I am amazed – gobsmacked – at three phenomena:

    – The extraordinary compacency of the coalition as a whole,
    – The equally extraordinary sense of entitlement of the LDs.
    – The craven toadying to the Fourth Reich and its septic currency.

    The LDs speak for perhaps 7% of recent opinion polls and yet no-one can even fart without asking their permission.

    Government borrowing might have stopped going up (a few straws in the wind suggest it) but it’s far from going down; the legions of jobsworths and unproductive public sector ‘workers’ are still there. We still have cohorts of diversity outreach politruki and steely-eyed lefty activists everywhere. The whole place might as well be a Soviet. Sod it, it IS a Soviet.

    Nothing – nothing – has been done to dismantle the NewLabour apparat, without which we cannot make any forward progress; nothing has been done to address the Great Repeal which would save billions and give us our country back; nothing has been done to point out that the disaster which is the UK today is even a temporary condition. Nothing has been done to remove the fist of the state from the neck of the benighted population.

    I am almost in a state of utter despair – the last hope is the markets, and we cannot afford to hold our breath. Oddly, I’m not very bearish at present, as we are not in new territory (yet) but that fact has nothing to do with the conduct of this government.

    Cameron should grow a pair – sack Cable and Huhne, (as Bliar should have sacked Brown), put Clegg back in his box and tell him to shut the fuck up and let the Libertarian Right of his party take up the strain. And if the LibDems pull the pin, then so be it. The country has seen them in action, and weighed them in the balance. They have been found wanting…

    • November 24, 2011 at 6:03 pm

      I think a fair bit of all this has to do with intractable civil service Sir Humphreys – and I’d probably be tempted to punch the dog if he was called Humphrey as well as Cameron – running rings around the government and persuading it that it must carry on much as its predecessor was doing before the election. That they can do this is, I think, partly due to Cameron lacking the balls to lay down the law to the CS and perhaps having too much fun playing with the levers of power, and partly to do with him being as thick as a brickie’s sandwich.

  10. james Higham
    November 24, 2011 at 2:56 pm

    Have to smile – 27 comments to a post on Cameron. Let’s see what happens to the one on Blair.

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