An interview with Mr. and Mrs. Blob


On the upside for the Tories, the lack of a bill means that Cameron will be able to claim that the Tories are the only party committed to legislating in the new parliament to deliver a vote.

The row over the bill came as Nick Boles, the Tory business minister, broke new ground by admitting that Britain would be unable to fully control its borders as long as it remained a member of the EU.

How many decades have you been politically sentient for? How many have I? And yet, seeing things like the above, why does the blood still boil?

A bunch of expenses fraudsters vote against what a majority of people want. Now that’s one thing and pundits are quite rightly putting the boot into these people but the truth is – someone, somewhere, voted these bozos in. Someone, somewhere, actually put a mark on a bit of paper next to their names.

I’d dearly like to interview such people.

“So tell me, Mr and Mrs. Blob, why did you vote for John Smith?”

“We’ve always voted Careerpol.”

“Uh-huh. If I showed you a poll which said a majority of this country would like a say on things like the EU, e.g. a referendum, would you support the right of people to have one?”

“Of course.”

“But you voted for a man who voted against that in parliament. Why would that be?”

“We’ve always voted Careerpol.”

“I see. Tell me, Mr. and Mrs. Blob, should everyone have the vote, even if they know nothing about politics and society and aren’t even interested?”


“Why, if they’re not interested?”

“It’s our right like.”

“And all those people with the vote who never vote – that’s their right too?”


“Do you think the nation’s in a good state?”

“Nah, it’s gone to the dogs, all this immigration and all that.”

“Uh-huh, and yet you voted for John Smith.”

“Well not for him like, more for Careerpol.”

“But John Smith has the vote in parliament. He could choose not to vote against the people or to vote against them.”

“We’ve always voted Careerpol.”

“You feel more secure somehow?”

“Well yes, these other ones get ideas like and Mr. Smith is so nice when he talks to us. he kisses babies too.”

“How would you feel about a proposal that you have to qualify, say with a test, before having the vote?”

“Nope, it’s my right. You some sort of rapist like?”


“That’s the one.”

“Sexist too. Let me ask you one more – do you believe we should have the right to recall a politician if he fails to do as he’s promised us?”

“Oh yes, definitely.”

“And yet John Smith voted against that.”

“We’ve always voted Careerpol.”

“Y-e-e-e-s-s-s, do you think people get the society they deserve?”

“Listen, Mr. Clever Clogs, let me ask you one – why do you want to take my vote away? You some sort of Commie?”


“You know, some sort of far right fascist like this drunk who crashes aeroplanes?”

“Centre-right libertarian you mean?”

“Don’t you swear at me in front of my wife. We’re awf, we are. And another thing – you thieving bastards leave my vote alone. Look what you’ve done to the country already! I’ll have you know we fought on the beaches to protect the likes of you.”

“What, both of you?”

“The trouble with people like you is you think because you got an ejucation, which we paid for, mind, you know it all. Our vote’s just as good z yours.”

“It’s certainly as effective.”

“Garn, be awf wi’you. We want none of yer high falutin cleverness round ‘ere.”

13 comments for “An interview with Mr. and Mrs. Blob

  1. October 29, 2014 at 10:04 am

    Just to add – I did actually have such a conversation with a tribal voter, on Twitter. She was a Tory from Sussex.

    She admitted she was against Cameron’s gay marriage, against not having a referendum, that Cameron has done badly – she was admitting this as if to a fellow Tory – but she was still going to vote Tory.

    When I asked why, she could have said, “Because my local member is a good representative,” but didn’t. She said she always voted Tory, always had, always would.

    I said I had voted that way for a long time but when a party ceases to represent either the values the nation was built on or the people within that nation, it’s time to rethink.

    She unfollowed me and blocked me, suspecting I was either one of those Kippers or closet Labour.

  2. October 29, 2014 at 11:32 am

    Rearrange the following to make a well known phrase or saying.

    Houses All A On Pox Their.

    And those who vote for them.

  3. October 29, 2014 at 1:32 pm

    it’s astounding, as I may have mentioned before I was a lifelong Tory voter, my parents, their parents and their parents all tories.
    My parents are local Tory councillors still. I can’t and won’t support their madness anymore, we need to change this entrenched way of thinking.
    People of my parents generation were brought up to believe in loyalty and that also went for politics, but times have changed, today’s politicians are not the good o’l boys of yesteryear they are liars and cheats without an ounce of loyalty to their supporters, so why then should their supporters have any loyalty to them, after all loyalty is a two way street. The trouble with many like the one you twattered with is they miss this point and are still entrenched in the old school of thought and of course the politicians still believe they command such loyalty, but they don’t and this is why they are all so scared of UKIP. The politicians have betrayed those who vote for them whilst still demanding our loyalty and they are beginning to realise that aint happening anymore.

    • Ted Treen
      October 29, 2014 at 4:03 pm

      The Tory party which you voted for when first casting your vote; the Tory party for which your parents are councillors, is no more.

      Cameron hi-jacked the party which he metamorphosed into “Blue Labour” in his quest to be the heir to Blair.

      Since the latter is a conniving, devious, mendacious self-serving heap of ordure, I can confirm that Cameron has achieved his aim.

      • October 29, 2014 at 8:40 pm

        I concur 100% Ted

  4. mona
    October 29, 2014 at 2:55 pm

    I walked past the UKIP operations HQ in Rochester High st today I looked in the window and saw three of the most beautiful women I have ever seen, made my mind up its got to be UKIP.

    • October 29, 2014 at 6:29 pm

      Would sway me too.

  5. wiggia
    October 29, 2014 at 3:48 pm

    This is a world wide problem James getting their grubby mitts of the levers of power is never going to be easy, even in an openly corrupt state such as SA Zuma is still voted back in despite not delivering a scintilla of that promised pre election and the rampant corruption and cronyism.
    Ditto the USA the south all vote for Obama and even now that black block of votes is there for him on the principal that he is black ? and will be for them, despite delivering nothing, the examples are everywhere.
    It’s getting those people who say they will vote differently to stick with it come election time, that is the key and it aint easy whatever the state of the other parties.

    • Ted Treen
      October 29, 2014 at 5:56 pm

      Wiggia, your point is well made: but one of the problems is our system wherein a very large number of votes are not cast primarily for a candidate, but are cast primarily against his opponent(s).

      • wiggia
        October 30, 2014 at 8:07 am

        Ted Treen, true, but it is still the same tribal mentality ruling over any common sense, the only party that has reached and surpassed the tipping point is the Front National in France, even there can they hang on to those votes come election time.
        Even in Greece where the ruling parties were totally corrupt and negligent while in office still garner enough votes to have a say, why after what has happened would anyone vote for them, as I said getting their grubby paws of……………….

      • wiggia
        October 30, 2014 at 8:17 am

        And this from elsewhere is relevant………….

        “One of the saddest lessons of history is this: If we’ve been bamboozled long enough, we tend to reject any evidence of the bamboozle. We’re no longer interested in finding out the truth. The bamboozle has captured us.

        It’s simply too painful to acknowledge, even to ourselves, that we’ve been taken. Once you give a charlatan power over you, you almost never get it back.”

        Carl Sagan

      • Flyinthesky
        October 30, 2014 at 2:35 pm

        I’ve been calling this phenomenon as “least worst option politics” for years, we no longer vote for what we want but what we’re told we must prevent.

    • Behind the veil
      October 30, 2014 at 7:23 am

      Some are starting to make a noise in America and quite rightly, because they’ve been sold a string of broken promises by those they believed had their back.

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