Most people don’t openly talk about personal matters in a blog such as this but I find it makes things clearer to see them in black and white print before the eyes. Then, instead of it swirling around the brain, one can see it before the eyes and it becomes easier to be dispassionate.

The big thing is to extract the emotion from situations before deciding, put it all down on paper, so to speak.

As for others, sometimes people need to observe, read the signs and not push too hard. All things eventually come to those who wait, if they’re the right thing to do. Patience.

My view is that every person is his/her own realm, own little bubble, that he/she is the sole arbiter of what happens or doesn’t happen within that bubble.

He/she also has to learn consequences of decisions – that this bubble has to work in with many other bubbles out there.

And equally, every person can delegate that power over his/her bubble if he wishes. However, if he/she does, that does not mean others will accept that.

Example – someone sells his soul to the devil, murders someone, says to the police that the ‘devil made me do it’. It might be so but it’s no defence in law and that person should go down for it. A husband might decide he can’t do anything without his wife’s permission but that’s not how an outsider sees it. If I talk to that man, I’m talking to him, not to his wife.

A man or woman on the bottle or needle has abrogated his power to decide to something inanimate. That’s a very foolish thing to do. The only thing we have is this power over ourselves. Your only power over me is that which I allow you to have. These are important principles.

It may be that a man will look at his own decision making and conclude that he hasn’t done it very well in life, that he has hurt people etc. He might wish to abrogate that primary power over himself. That’s what John 3:16 is all about – it’s about a conscious decision on the part of the person over his own soul, his own right to make decisions. But that’s for him, not for anyone else. There’s no right to expect anyone else to do as he’s done.

In the community, so many people don’t really wish for freedom – they wish for security. I don’t believe many people do have freedom or power over themselves – not nearly as much as they like to think – I believe that something or someone, whether it’s the bottle, the needle, the obsession, the project, the cycle of revenge, the govt, the wife – that that is what has the power and people allow it to happen.

Often they can’t even see it. Often they know very well their failing but can’t stop it.

What I do know is that my life is my own, unless I hand over some powers to a Higher Authority, which I’ve done in my case. Therefore, if you come at me, demanding I do this or that, it’s not arrogance on my part when I say I’ll decide and get back to you. It’s a simple statement that I must consider this request and speak to my Boss, then speak to people close to me and from all this, I have the facts needed to decide.

That’s how I made major decisions when I was a headmaster. It wasn’t democracy but it did involve listening to others, canvassing quality opinion and then deciding. And ‘quality’ meant that most people looked up to that person, not what I personally felt.

Some of you reading this would have picked up the discrepancy already. Having written that I speak with that man, not his wife, what if he asserts that it’s his wife and himself or no one? What if the UK says it’s the EU and us, or nothing? What if Bulgaria says it’s EU law or nothing?

The only choice then is for the other person to make decisions based on that. In Putin’s case, it meant the end of South Stream. In the case of the UK, I and millions of others will not consider the EU in decisions about us. Therefore we act to bring the EU down.

I wanted a lady to make a change on her blog once. All I could do was present my case and back off. She then did her own research, spoke to her own people, did it her way. Then she made a decision and wrote back. And that’s the most power we can ever have over others or rather – should have.

There’s a man I know who says to his little granddaughter: ‘Here’s what we’re doing today.’ She’s learnt to ask: ‘And if I don’t want?’ He answers: ‘Well here are the consequences.’ But she is still the one who decides for herself whether to comply or not. And of course, there is a lot of love going on in there too.

I really like that – it acknowledges the person’s right to make decisions for herself, even if coerced. And she stands or falls by her decision. So she learns discretion, thinking it through, being calm when deciding. She learns to push on this point but not on that. She learns she’s going to get a result here with a little tantrum but not there.

But it only works if he’s consistent. If he never bows to pressure. A kid needs consistency in an adult and I think an adult needs it too. If I say I’ll decide something by Tuesday, then I’ll decide it by Tuesday. Actually – I must stick to that because the whole edifice depends on that consistency.

What’s the N1 thing people have against Call Me Dave? His u-turns of course, how he reneges at the drop of a hat. No one can trust him. Now everyone’s watching Nigel, waiting to see him u-turn.

So, if you’re about to change a policy, what do you do? Stick to your policy guns, no matter what, change instantly or go through a long process of fact gathering and debate? You’re damned if you’re cavalier, you’re dithering if you go through the process.

Above all, you have to mean what you say. Someone whose very existence is having power over others is going to utterly hate a person who makes his or her own decisions. The EU hates it, people in our own lives hate it.

But it’s the right thing to do.

9 comments for “Power

  1. mona
    December 8, 2014 at 12:53 pm

    Jimmy babe, I would like to say so much, rid ourselves of Europe we rid ourselves of a monster that is destroying us and the ruin of the people of Europe all other matters pale before this

  2. December 8, 2014 at 2:38 pm

    I agree with you James, in my humble experience one can only have power over ones self.
    It is a hard thing to juggle though because one takes into consideration the impact on others of one’s decision making processes, or at least I do, as I am the only person I am free to speak for.
    I look at decisions I make and my guideline is “will I be able to look at myself in the mirror and live with the decision I make”, so in 20 years time will I be at peace with myself. Of course this is a very individual thing as it is utterly dependent on the individual moral code and the things we have been taught from childhood.
    So someone who grows up with inconsistency and at least one bad moral decision making parent is likely to repeat some of that bad decision making after all we learn by example more often than not, it depends how strong an influence the role model is.
    My biggest decisions are always fact based, well researched and made solely by me (knowledge is power) so I arm myself with knowledge, of course some emotion comes into play, but for me the out come is firmly balanced on my shoulders and I can live with myself “looking in the mirror” knowing I did the best I could based on circumstances at the time.
    Does this mean I am always right? Not by any means, but it does however mean I can sleep nights.
    In terms of Politicians and decision making I believe our political system has changed and our politicians have changed their moral compass to fit it.
    If we expect a certain level from ourselves we should expect that level from others.
    Politicians put themselves “outside” of the boundaries of ordinary mortals, and that for me is where the trouble lies because they see themselves as “better than us” so their decisions must be RIGHT. They seem to lose the ability to be humble and admit mistakes, but they also seem to be devoid of commonsense and the ability to be genuine.
    Whats that old saying”Pride comes before a fall” never make decisions bases in pride because you are bound to come a cropper.
    As for the EU a more prideful and misguided bunch you could not hope to meet hence the rubbish decision making.

  3. December 8, 2014 at 11:09 pm

    Couple of issues getting comments up. Sorry ’bout that.

  4. richard
    December 9, 2014 at 12:09 am

    I don’t follow you. Your murder example could result in “not guilty by reason of insanity. Your needle or bottle example is not inanimate because it’s the brain doing the thinking in any case.Your life is your own, agreed, unless you hand it over to a higher power. Most people have handed theirs to a lower power ie mob rule democracy and belief that” government” exists. You have handed yours to another power which is less harmful than government but operates on the same principles. The central “G-word” is invisible, there are people administering to it, and you get punished if you don’t follow the rules. A religion. Since you appear to believe that the UK and Europe are real, aren’t you following two masters? God didn’t make the UK, nor were we told to get laws by selecting the least-obvious narcissitic lout on a four-yearly basis. Voting and politics- how is that relevant to someone who hasn’t been fooled by the type of person who gets a kick from ordering people about?

    • December 9, 2014 at 11:25 am

      Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s.

      • richard
        December 9, 2014 at 2:00 pm

        Isn’t the point in that saying to do with JC trying to establish a moneyless society along the all-men-are-brothers line? You can’t complain about taxes if you’re operating with coinage which has been issued by a tax-based God – and weren’t various Caesars legally gods? But the disciples shared food and didn’t charge people for feeding multitudes and were outside the money system.

  5. Hereward unbowed.
    December 9, 2014 at 12:30 am


    A lackadaisical student and for good reason, thus I was mercilessly picked on by my Latin master. Old Jake, he was a stickler and a damn fine teacher, a pedant bar none. He was a disciplinarian and would strike the fear of God into some lads, dish out the ‘ferulas’ and he was a wiry figure but demanding of respect to which even the ones who were brought up on the harsh concrete estates and in the terraced backstreets and miners sons at that, all gave him a wide berth but due deference.

    When we left school and at alumni reunions, together we all used to make a bee-line to talk to ‘old Jake’ – for we admired him enormously and by God…we used to extol; damn it all – we never could get one past him try as we did – “for it takes one to know one” 😉


    Making hard decisions but do it in truth and with good heart and clear conscience [easier said than done admittedly] and people remember and mark it. And for those who hate, well then that’s their problem. For, it takes a real man to stand up and be counted!

    And of Dave?

    Like them all, he is just a boy who courts ephemera and loves the hollow fame of notoriety and nothing else but…always with a frequent glance to the looking glass.

  6. December 9, 2014 at 12:53 am

    That ‘Higher Power’ had a few things to say too. Very few things. His most useful one was “I forgive you. Now go, and Sin no more”. He did back it up with some useful advice about what ways we could adopt as we went on our way, and the consequences of not doing things as suggested, but despite having the Power to compel, he let people make their own choice.

    • richard
      December 9, 2014 at 7:54 am

      I’m outside my area of expertise, in fact I don’t have any area of expertise but having said that – as far as I see it the mission of JC was to get people back to obeying the ten commandments plus to love your neighbour as yourself. Not unreasonable, given that if the ten-plus-one commands were obeyed the so-called political problems would not exists. For instance the one about “graven images”. People think about wooden idols etc but that’s not right. It’s about mistaking something dead for something living. The government is not a living thing, neither is a country or flag. People forget that and so we have wars. That’s just one example.
      God supposedly built his kingdom, gave us the Law, sent someone to remind us to keep them and that’s it. Everything else is worse than useless including the belief in a “better place”. This is it, the world is all there is and we’ve turned it into a bad place mostly by believing in the false God of the State and in the belief that we need the authority of other men to go about our peaceful activities. Example: we have to pay HMRC to receive something from abroad. Why? Because they punish us if we don’t. Where do they get the authority to do this? From us, there’s nobody else here. Does HMRC exist? No, there are buildings and people in uniform who act as if it does. A non-existent entity given power by belief. A graven image, something we were specifically warned about and which extracts money from commerce just by the power of belief.

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