America’s leader has just announced an end to America’s problems. Forget the massive debt, running into literally 18 trillions of dollars. Forget the ferocious onslaught on ISIL, which is achieving absolutely nothing. Forget the 7,000 American soldiers still stationed in Afghanistan, acting as stationary targets for the odd Taliban with an AK-47 and an itch. Forget the huge problems with race, and black-on-black crime, and drugs, and illegal immigrants. Forget about the ongoing slog for millions of Americans who are searching for a job!
Don’t worry about all those festering problems; for your fearless Leader has just done something incredibly brave, far-sighted and with incredible honesty and compassion.
He has just renamed Mount McKinley as Mount Denali.
We are saved! Glory Hallelujiah! We are saved!
I would add that an anagram for Denali is, of course, Denial: but would never, ever dream of capitalising upon this fact.