But No Mention Of Symmetrical Book Stacking, Right..?

“The officers attended expecting it to be a mental health issue but they witnessed the lights going off, clothes flying across the room and the dog [the family’s pet Chihuahua] sitting on top of a hedge,” a police source said.


“The officers called their superiors, who also attended, thinking the cops were perhaps being a bit silly. But it’s being taken very seriously.”

Well, I’m sure if the sprit world starts posting offensive Tweets, Police Scotland will be all over it.

“One problem we’ve got is where we go from here, as no crime has been established, so what else can we do but deal with any reports of disturbances,” the police source said.

Try the old ‘breach of the peace’, and if that doesn’t work, contact The Folly.

6 comments for “But No Mention Of Symmetrical Book Stacking, Right..?

  1. August 16, 2016 at 12:30 pm

    And if you have ever actually been in Rutherglen, you might understand why the dog was sitting on the hedge. (if you have ever peaked at the videos where alleged human beings are seen in sexual congress with various animals, you might understand it from the poor bloody pooch’s point of view).

    Exorcism, my arse! When everything is inspected, and the source of the disturbance is found to be closely allied to a) an I.Q. in the high thirties b) close association with the cheapest vodka on the market, and c) a demand to be re-housed in a more salubrious (if one can imagine that) part of Rutherglen; you might understand a touch more about this particular story.

    • Auralay
      August 17, 2016 at 5:07 pm

      I may – or may not – have peeked at such videos but I certainly never peaked!

      • August 28, 2016 at 6:09 am


  2. Penseivat
    August 16, 2016 at 12:47 pm

    Not certain about Scottish law, but in England and Wales, Breach of the Peace has to occur in a public place. If the events happened inside a house, not a lot the Police can do under that legislation.

  3. August 16, 2016 at 2:44 pm

    They didn’t mention anything about the ‘named person’. Oh yes, that idea was disallowed by a chap in a wig. Pity though as the named person could have stopped any shennanigans (or the Scottish equivalent) to make sure the wee tots’ wellbeing was preserved. And we could have read a meticulously composed report (with translation). No doubt remains in my mind that the poltryguest would have been declared English.

    • August 28, 2016 at 6:10 am

      Well, of course!.

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