Oh; the Horror!

I note that the R.A.F. is now going against all Government policies as it airlifts vital supplies to stranded communities which have been cut-off by the snow in darkest Cumbria. The R.A.F. Chinook helicopter, carrying food and other vital supplies to isolated farms and villages were tasked to fly after five days of impassable snow drifts blocking snow-ploughs and gritting lorries from making any impact at all on the driving snow.

But the danger, the terrible truth: is that the Chinook crews are carrying sacks of coal; COAL! The awful truth that people are still burning COAL in their fireplaces has commenced filtering back into the dens of Liberal and Green thought in arctic places such as Islington (hiya Emily, how’s the husband; Lord Nugee?), and there is desolation: and horror. The word has simply not got through! COAL: the very harbinger of death, the very Valkyrie of Climate Change: releasing, as it does, immeasurable quantities of Carbon Dioxide; the very kiss of death to civilisation as we know it, where the seas will overcome the lands, the polar bears will all die from malnutrition, Tuvalu will slowly sink into the Pacific, and the ‘Celebs’ will have to find somewhere else to find ‘solitude’ because the Maldives will be under water as well!

And all this because some selfish farmers in Cumbria cannot invest in passive central heating, upgraded insulation and a big freezer!

But what is worse? What can I mean; worse? What can be worse than burning COAL, the harbinger of doom? The R.A.F. were also carrying LOGS. Yes, they were carrying sliced up segments of Nature’s bounty, cruelly sliced down and chopped up into handy BURNABLElogs. Logs which, if burnt in anything not compliant with the latest Government-approved combustion-friendly rules, will produce AIR Pollutants which will kill you if breathed in for, well, a long-long-long time, and if you also vote Tory, which is almost as bad! I mean, the very Mayor of London wants them banned (wood-burner fires; not Tories)

Reader, write / email / phone / engage a cleft-stick carrier person Immediately: write to the Ministry of Defence and complain; and tell them that this travesty against all the Climate Change rules must cease-desist-stop forever!

4 comments for “Oh; the Horror!

  1. Penseivat
    March 5, 2018 at 9:02 pm

    Under a Labour/Lib/Greenies government, the helicopters would be solar powered and be carrying flat pack wind turbines. There is no doubt about it, we are f*cking doomed.

    • March 5, 2018 at 9:30 pm

      “cannot invest in passive central heating”

      Where the boiler contantly breaks down

  2. Pcar
    March 5, 2018 at 11:58 pm

    GrandPa1940 Mike,

    I wish our house had an open fire & chimney to provide heat when elec/gas fails.

    Well done RAF, Navy, Royal Marines and Army for helping others when UK Gov’t and Councils failed again.

    UK Gov’t and Councils inaction was more pronounced than more snow for longer winters 2010/11 & 2011/12 – lessons learned, nope all forgotten and now worse.

  3. March 9, 2018 at 6:44 am

    The Maldives would not be the haven of rich holiday-makers that it has become, had the RAF not buit an airfield on Gan. Chaps were posted there for one year tours and they even had a tie – it is the ‘female’ sign: the circle and plus sticking out at a flirty angle, with a red diagonal bar throught it as in a ‘Stop’ sign, and roman numerals for 12 – xii- beneath. (I have one). Perhaps an airfield in Cumbria might bring International holiday makers too and they could have a special visa allowing them to stay only in Cumbria. (and BYO coal). Even a tie.

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